A forever Asleep Parakeet.

Last Friday I went back to work for the first time, it was a KIT day, i’m not done on my maternity leave yet; I have mixed feelings about that particular subject. I generally get up early every morning now (early for me being seven-AM, I know, I am lucky) on the odd occasion I do get a bit longer, I have figured out that she will nap with me while having her morning feed in bed. Co-sleeping, a whole other basket of eggs!

My point being I will now be getting up even earlier (when I am back at work) and i’m not sure how I will manage this change in my routine, or for that matter how Joanie will manage this. I have to be at work for seven in the morning usually (I didn’t have to on my KIT day, as it was mainly training), therefore I have to get up at least at 5:30 as of when I get back to work. That leaves half hour to feed Joanie (I plan on breastfeeding till she is at least one) then about half hour to have breakfast and get ready myself; I really cant manage any earlier than 5:30, I just am not a early bird at all. I am also not a night owl either. I am a forever asleep parakeet (I just really like parakeets, and it rhymes). I know it sounds lazy, but I love sleep and when you work 12 1/2 hour shifts you need all of your concentration. Plus I can get ready fast, I do sometimes skip breakfast in place of a snack bar, but I eat later at ten anyway.

My day went pretty well, I felt like I was able to easily slip back into my role; I even felt that I may finally want a higher position when I get back, after speaking to my manager. I easily understood my training and I would suggest to anybody, doing your mandatory training as a KIT day, a month or so before you go back to work, definitely helps you get back into it. I  sorted out all my holidays for next year, and I sorted out my return to work too, so i got a lot done. On top of that my practice development lead found me a lovely place to express and even sorted me out a fridge, so I have a room and fridge when I get back, perfect. So on one level I am kind of excited about going back to work. I’m not going to lie, it was really nice to have some adult conversation and not be my daughters sole carer all day for once. That sounds really bitter, i’m not, I love my daughter, I love looking after her, but I am still me, I was somebody before I had a baby. My job was a part of me, I plan on bringing my baby into my lifestyle and compromising, That has been how it is so far, that’s how I would like it to continue.

But at the same time, I have watched my colleagues miss out on so much. They have missed out on: Christmas,Birthdays, Holidays, school plays, milestones and so much much more. As much as my job is an integral part of who I am, so is my family,  you only have one life I don’t want to miss out on all these things I just wont get back. There may be ways to reduce this as much as possible but, I think this is the issue with any working parent, you do miss things and its hard not too.

I’m still so caught up in this dilemma, I have considered moving jobs, but the job I was considering (although pays more) would bore me, as much as I try to dress it up and make it look good. Plus I would miss my current work. I would stop myself progressing in my job, I have been put back once, I don’t want to be put back again.

If anybody figures these issues out please let me know, I will be giving myself a headache until I find a really good compromise. If I find out how to do that I will let you know.

9 Comments Add yours

  1. diaryofninemonths says:

    I’ve been back for about 5 or so months (where did time go?!) and I still haven’t found a balance yet! I’ve found a job that ticks the boxes hours wise. But when I hear about what he got up to during the day and what he was like at playgroups and stuff I feel a pang of mummy guilt and like I’m really missing out. I know he’s loving having some friends to see everyday and sometimes that’s the only motivation for going in, because I know I’m working for him to have fun and learn. But it’s hard. So hard. But that could just be because I’m not sure about my work. Maybe someone who loves their job more than I do will find it easier 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha ha I’m sure I’ll have poop days where I really don’t want to go back, that, I’m not looking forward to at all! Im not looking forward to finding out what she’s been up to knowing I’ve missed it either. Let me know when it gets better ha ha. I do like my job now, we shall see how much I like it when I get back… xxx


      1. diaryofninemonths says:

        I cried my first day back, people thought I was lame for it. Turns out someone who returned from mat leave the week after me cried too 😂 so I felt better about it 😂 it’s better when someone else is going through it 🙈 xxx

        Liked by 1 person

      2. There’s four of us returning so hopefully somebody will feel like I do lol 😂 xxx


      3. diaryofninemonths says:

        Omg that’s quite a few! Xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I am super jealous that you have had so long off with your baby! I only got 3 months and had to fight for even that much time since my baby was a premie. But at the same time, being off with your child that long and being used to seeing them everyday for a year, I can’t imagine how hard that would be either. That is a huge change. I hope it goes well for you when you officially start back to work!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! Wow 3 months is unfair especially with An NICU baby! I assume your not in the UK we get 9 months maternity (up to a year). If you can afford it and work for a good company that will pay you! My friend lives in Malaysia and she also only gets 3 months x

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I live in the US where the standard is 6 weeks if you deliver vaginally, 8 weeks with a c-section. But if you are with a decent company you can get up to 3 months, which still isn’t very much. That’s amazing your company will pay you for up to a year! I had no idea Malaysia was also only 3, I thought we were the worst. Glad to know we are not alone lol

        Liked by 1 person

      2. You don’t get paid for the whole year, your job has to pay you for 9 but you can have the last 3 months off unpaid. I can’t believe you only get that amount of time off!! It’s like your having a medical procedure and sick time not a baby! How rubbish! What if you want to breastfeed? I can’t imagine that is easily done when you have to be at work when they are 3 months old! Xxx


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