Motivate the goblin lady!

I have very poor excuses, I feel like the weather is taking its toll on me already and its only the very end of September! That and I also have started a new job, which although is nowhere near as physically demanding as my previous job, it is still quite different and is therefore taking a lot of getting used to. This also comes with a dollop of extra stress. (maybe in hindsight committing to blog posting 3 times a week, which so far I have 100% not achieved, was a bit optimistic.)

I moan about the weather but in fact I love autumn, its my favorite season, but as with most things in my life I appear to have a very love hate relationship with it. I was looking forward to blogtober but I really don’t think that I will manage it this year, I just have in no way been anywhere organised enough for it. Looking at all my blogger friends I think I may be the only one not par taking. I m just so lazy, I have looked at all the tips out there on how to motivate myself to get things done (I even brought a bullet journal, that I have filled out one page of).

In regards to my writing, again I am not getting as far as I would have liked to have, but on the plus side I am actually writing and I feel that I’m getting better at it. In terms of my writing over the next year I do have a few goals I would like to achieve. The first one being to take part in the Dorset fiction award again. I did enjoy it a lot last year and if I am honest I would like to take part in more competitions, I feel like because there is a prize I work harder towards my goal.

Second I would like to take part in NaNoWriMo again this year, last year it encouraged me to write 20,000 words of my book, which has never happened before. I very often start a book only to get stuck and lose interest. The good thing about Nanowrimo is that you have goals and tasks – I am a very task oriented person therefore this kind of thing works wonders for my motivation.

Thirdly I would also love to join a writers class as I haven’t had any tutoring in writing since I left school and sometimes very much feel like I need a lot of direction.

So some of these things I am also hoping to write about as I do them, Which hopefully some of you will find interesting!

Else where in my life I am coming to grips with this new job as I explained before, I cant go into much detail about my job due to confidentiality and the nature of being a nurse, however I can definitely tell you that I work twilight’s now. Oh how naive I have been! It sounded perfect before I actually did it. I thought I could have my daughter all day (It would be so much fun) and then I could swan into work for my shift, still return home at half past midnight; I would then still get AT LEAST 7 hours sleep. Oh dear, that’s not how life works at all. So currently i’m getting back home only to fart around till two in the morning, doing a variety of tasks: looking at my phone, watching one episode of something I fancy on the TV, the washing, tidying and so many other stupid things. I really don’t know how to switch off (this is not new so I have no idea why I thought i’d manage it!)

On top of this my daughter has started waking up at 6. (Now I know this is normal, and so many of you have it much worse, but i’m going to moan anyway) She used to wake up at 8 (I was blessed) So now i’m just tired always. Working full time and having a child (and not really putting her into child care that much, because I really don’t have the money) Is hard. Really pissing hard, I don’t know what i’m doing anymore, I just rock up to places looking like some sort of angry goblin lady and continue with my day. At least my child looks OK, I think when she hasn’t rubbed banana into every crevice she can find.

Well that’s how things are going so far.